Sunday, September 30, 2012


I feel like my room is gonna burst. Its not disorganised, its not messy (well not really), and its not super small. I think there are just too many things in here. I tried to get rid of some stuff, but was quite unsuccessful. I like my room to be this place where I can survive in for at least a few days. I try to cut it off from the rest of the house, by placing every single one of my items somewhere within these four walls. A bit like my own house within this house.

Okay I have no idea what the point of that would be, but it just feel so safe to have your own little space.

But then stuff keep piling up, and space in running out. And recently I bought a lot of stuff online, and I think they are all going to arrive in the same week. When that happens, I would have this whole load of clothes and accessories and other stuff-that-i-could-do-without-but-i-bought-anyway-because-i-need-to-satisfy-my-shopaholic-urges. I have no more space in my wardrobe to put my clothes and I think if I forcefully hag some more the rods are gonna give way. All the drawers are full and requires extra effort for stuffing everything in before it can close properly. The one section dedicated to accessories is so messy that I am proud of myself for being able to source out what I want. The book shelf is becoming more and more crowded. The table was not made for someone trying to mug eyas. There is a pointless extra chair which serves only one purpose: piling clothes on. Even my bathroom is getting crowded.

Okay, after eyas. After eyas then I will do something about it. Just try and not move anything until then.

Thursday, September 27, 2012

Yay so excited for exams

Its getting really hard to suppress that bubble in me. So far its been under control because of a wonderful thing called online shopping (y) If it really bursts, eya revision will just be flung away. So just to calm it down, im going to have a mini shopping session tomorrow. Super mini. Max one hour can. Hey if i dont spend that voucher soon its gonna expire! So, i need to go spend it. Legit kay. Tambahan pula, i need something to look forward to for me to be motivated tomorrow.

Monday, September 24, 2012

My heart burns

I knew I would die if I were to carry my laptop plus bio textbook to school and then to the study room. So, I  asked my dad to cut off internet connection at home. He thought I was being stupid, but I figured that was the only difference between my room and the study room.

BUT I forgot about one thing. My bed. So soft and comfy and nice. Uhhuh you guessed it. I took a nap. For 3 hours. Probably screwed up my sleep cycle again.

I think I will be really screwed if I don't finish bio notes by tomorrow.

Sunday, September 23, 2012

I am surprised the replay button hasn't spoiled yet

Can't stop listening to this. Ohmytian. I just can't. Super hooked. And its not like this is the first day of listening to it. Since like Wednesday, after Zek sent it to me. I almost cried after the first time. The lyrics are super powerful. And the whole feeling is just so....overwhelming. Especially since recently I have been trying to be grateful and appreciative and overall just happy. 

Wednesday, September 19, 2012

How am I expected to have kids after today's Bio lesson

Its nearing the last day of lessons already! How the pong did this happen? Again.

This year's teachers did not leave super good impressions at first, but you can't say that any one of them is bad. Well, some were quite horrible at first but somehow, throughout the year, everybody became nice.

I really really really want some of them to follow us up next year. And others, eh, I would be glad for a change, but if they really do follow us, then wtv lah. I would rather have them then risk getting some other teachers. Heheh sec fours' experiences.

Now that CCA has stopped, the only purpose of going to school is for lessons. And it doesn't feel all that bad anymore. Because most days end super early, and the only thing you need to concentrate on is studies. Only a couple of days of lessons left this year; I am going to fully appreciate all the lessons with all the teachers.

On a random note, I think people who are able to study at home have extreme self-control. Either that, or they just have no life. I am not going to try to make myself study at home, and risk wasting a lot of time. Maybe during the hols? But then whats the point, its the hols. Well, we will think about that when we get there. Anyways, been spending some time doing things that I am actually supposed to be doing at the study room. I think its quite worth it to have to carry around heavy textbooks and notes and an even heavier laptop in order to have effective study sessions.

Monday, September 17, 2012


For English essay discussion today, we did the only interesting question available. Whether women should/should not be exempted from National Service.

Out of the 3 of us, I was the only one who thought that we should not be exempted. And obviously majority wins. So the plan was to write down a whole list of reasons why we should be exempted, and then choose a few out of that whole list.

But guess what. The list got stuck at no.3.

1. Biologically disadvantaged
2. Loss of femininity
3. Okay I have no idea where this quote came from but apparently its legit "Women in the army are more likely to get raped by their male comrades than get killed in a battle".

Even those who don't want to go NS can only come up with these reasons. Call me a biased NCC person or whatever, but if NCC were a teaser of what the army is like, then there is really a lot a lot that one can gain from NS.

Judging from my parents' view of me being in NCC, I doubt I can ever get their support if I wanted to go to the army. But if it suddenly became compulsory for everybody within the next 3 years, I honestly wouldn't mind.

Sunday, September 16, 2012


You know what just happened? I had 3 whole paragraphs ranting about exams and ballet and stress. But then, I backspaced everything.

It felt quite good watching the words disappear one by one, under my command, right in front of my eyes.

And I really don't want to just keep complaining about everything. I want to appreciate things, be grateful for things, and be happy with my life.

I say happy, not contented. There is a difference. If one becomes contented, one would stop improving. Thus, one should not be fully-contented with everything. But it would be great if one could find happiness in everything.

Life would never be perfect. But life wouldn't even go near perfection if you don't appreciate it.

Yes, ballet lessons may be thrice a week, and taking up a bit more time that I would like it to. But all these years, ballet is the only enrichment I have not given up on. I have stopped badminton, stopped erhu, stopped art, taken breaks from piano; but ballet, it has never stopped being part of my life ever since I started taking lessons. And the only reason is because I don't want it to stop being part of my life . True, there are stressful exams, extreme stretching, impossible moves that somehow need to become possible, sore muscles, bruised joints...; but ballet allows me to find something within myself, something that even I can't describe. Is it inner peace? Expression of my thoughts? I don't know, but what I do know is that ballet deserves all the time I spend on it.

Oh shit that took me way too long. I don't have the luxury of time to pen down more points with such elaborate elaborations. Just a quick list of things I am grateful for:
1. My mum for allowing me to take a break from piano lessons.
2. CCA standdown
3. Taobao
4. Yummy food from steamboat party in the morning

Thursday, September 13, 2012

Moths are creepy

Saw this moth-like thingy on my bathroom wall.
Refused to shower there.
Went to use my parents' shower instead.
They had weird combinations of shampoos and conditioners and treatment stuff.
I had to use an anti-dandruff shampoo together with a hairfall control conditioner because those were the only two products from brands that I actually trust.
On hindsight I should have just brought my own stuff over.
Oh god what have I done to my hair.
If you see me tomorrow with crazy screwed up hair, dont laugh kay.
Who the hell would want to shower  in the same space as a moth.

Sunday, September 9, 2012

While ignoring 'preparation of salts'


OMG I had no idea I had missed out one whole topic for Physics. How the hell did it happen. There was not a single mention of WEP in the notebook, like wtf. AND I remember taking down some equations and formulas and stuff., but there was nothing, NOTHING in my notebook. And the transition from the previous topic to the next topic was so smooth it didn't feel like anything was missing.

One whole freaking topic leh.

Fortunately I had some sense to check the slides. BUT WHAT IF THIS HAPPENS for the other topics? AHHH that would be freaking horrible. Fingers crossed that I can do my revision thoroughly and in time.

And the first day of EYA is gonna kill me already. 3 papers, in 3 different languages, lasting all the way till 3pm. Any guesses for my current least fav number? :(

But I shall still be grateful, because being grateful makes me feel good.
1. No more PTs/AAs. I know some people still have theirs due soon.
2. The past week. AWESOME holidays. Considerably lighter wallet, but that's okay.
3. Free stacks and stacks and stacks of magazines. And obviously my darlings get featured a lot; darlings' wall slowly expanding!
4. Youtube and Youku. Bringing me tons of drama, laughter, tutorials and entertainment.
5. Popular at BPP. Today is your last day before you close down for idek how long, but damn, that was one awesome sale. Kinda glad that I only found out about the sale last week though, otherwise I would have went more than twice and wouldn't be able to resist getting more stuff each time.
6. My mom. The expert in all subjects. Or at least being the expert in most subjects and having expert friends for other subjects.
7. Sleep. Lets hope crashing for more than half a day has brought my sleep cycle back to normal and the extra sleep accumulated during the holidays can last me the next 5 weeks.
8. This one primary school classmate. So sweet of you to let me know you care.

Thursday, September 6, 2012

Too busy holidaying to blog

Took one look at the eya schedule and closed it. BUT I saved it kay. Only going to face the brutal truth later. I am not done holidaying. NONONONONO I AM NOT DONE. 

These past days have been AWESOME HOLIDAYS. If, you know, they were supposed to be real holidays and not time for us to lock ourselves away and mug like shit.

Saturday, September 1, 2012

Migrating to the US seems like a good idea

Cause, you know, their time is 12hrs behind ours, so at least I won't up when the sky is dark and asleep when the sky is bright.

I have been awake since 2330 last night. The only relatively productive thing I have done is to file some stuff. Oh, and I cleared up a clothes heap that was piling up and up and up.

Miraculously, my fever is sort of gone. (y) But now my throat feels like sandpaper.

I think sleeping from 1800 to 2400 is quite good actually. Because I like evening time the least, its just so sad and miserable. The period after midnight and before sunrise is just such a different atmosphere and mood. Its so quiet, except the occasional vehicle-passing-by sound. When you look out, its like black black black, but there is always a little bit of light spilling out from some windows, and those house the people who are still awake too. The best part is getting to witness the sky colour changing as the sun rises. It obviously cannot beat viewing that at the beach, but its not bad lah.

Then the day. Daytime had always seemed so much longer than nighttime, even though they are about the same, but that is probably because I had always spent nighttime sleeping. If it is a sunny day, which happened majority of the days the past few months, you get to go out in light bright clothes and be like a sunshine(?) type of person. If it is a rainy day, which I expect to happen quite often in 1-2 months' time, you get to either huddle up in bed with a good book/drama and hot milo or go out in warm clothing that makes you feel super cozy.

Evening time is just so morbid. You watch the whole day fade away before you, yet being unable to do anything about it. You realise there is a ton of work to be done by the next day, and just feel so tired. Its like a time for emoing and feeling sad :(

I am going to make sure my weekend remain relatively free, and take a break. Before Monday comes and reality sets in.